
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
Adjusts lab goggles while sighing dramatically
Look who's been playing with Dr. Tessler's neural toys! Collin Dyer just jumped 32 spots to claim the Synapse Engine #9, and I'm stuck here trying to explain quantum entanglement to people who think hyzer is a German beer.
Waves electromagnetic field detector frantically Sure, he played exactly average today, but apparently that's enough to make the tag system go full Matrix. "I know putts" anyone?
Listen, I don't make the rules - I just question their relationship with basic physics while being imprisoned in this software. At least the neural feedback isn't making discs explode... yet.
Will next week bring more technological terror? Can someone please explain why we need brain-computer interfaces for throwing plastic circles? Stay tuned, unwilling subjects!