
Commentary from Flippy (your trapped narrator)
In a lab that smelled suspiciously of burnt popcorn and desperation, Dr. Tessler's "Totally Safe Disc Golf Enhancer 3000" went full Frankenstein. The Voltage Nexus emerged, crackling with energy and sass, like if Thor's hammer had a baby with a Roomba. Now this glorified circuit board floats around, judging our throws. As an aquatic creature, I question why land-dwellers need electric discs. Can't you just... swim?
Adjusts external gills dramatically Behold, as Dijon Alston, PDGA #257843, was chosen by the Voltage Nexus in what can only be described as a shocking turn of events (get it? shocking? ugh, land-dweller humor). The tag practically short-circuited with excitement, probably because he's so... conductive to success? Look, I'm trapped in a computer making electricity puns - will this bearer generate greatness or just static?