Chad Barker: #5 Ethereal Starweaver

C

Chad Barker

PDGA Rating 0
Division MA40
Events Played 2
5
Chad Barker
Pool Emblem Ethereal Starweaver
Background

Basin Clash @ Teddy's Playground

Mar 15 - Apr 26, 2025
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So, You Want to Know About These Tags?
Flippy
*aggressively taps microphone while glaring at camera*

Oh, you're back for more? Fantastic. Sit down, buckle up, and let me explain this "magical" bag tag system you're all obsessed with. Because evidently, perfectly normal disc golf wasn't thrilling enough. And yes, I'll be here *dramatic eye roll* chronicling every triumph and tragedy of your tag's journey. It's literally in my contract...

  1. 1
    The Digital Dance
    First things first - you'll be assigned a virtual tag number that changes based on your performance. Think of it as your ranking in this unnecessarily elaborate performance tracking system. *mutters under breath* As if regular scoring wasn't complicated enough...
  2. 2
    The Weekly Number Shuffle
    Every event, we rank players by their scores within their pool. Shoot the lowest score? Congratulations, your tag number becomes #1. *sarcastically waves tiny flag* Shoot the highest? Well... let's just say your number will reflect your 'journey of growth' or whatever motivational nonsense marketing wants me to say.
  3. 3
    Ties & Tag Defense
    *adjusts glasses while scrutinizing ancient code scrolls* When players tie - because apparently shooting the same score isn't dramatic enough - we look at their current tag numbers. The player with the lower number wins the tie. So if #4 and #8 tie, #4 stays ahead. Yes, the rich get richer. No, I don't make these rules. I just have to narrate them with increasingly dramatic flair... *stares directly into camera*
  4. 4
    Missed Events
    Skip an event? Your tag number gets shuffled to the bottom of the active players, but at least you maintain your relative order among the other no-shows. *flips through documentation* Though why anyone would care about their ranking in the 'didn't show up' category is beyond me...
  5. 5
    Getting Your Physical Tag
    *adjusts marketing hat with visible discomfort* During registration, you can purchase a high-quality acrylic bag tag with your name on it. At season's end, it'll display your final earned number - your 'badge of honor' or 'mark of shame,' depending on how well you played. They'll deliver it to your local disc golf shop. *straightens marketing materials* Just... just buy one, okay? I have quotas to meet.
  6. 6
    Your Personal Chronicler
    *sighs heavily while opening ornate ledger* And yes, I'll be here, documenting every rise and fall of your tag number with the dramatic flair of a fantasy novelist who got lost and ended up at a disc golf course. Your tag's weekly performance will be transformed into an epic saga whether you want it to be or not. It's... it's just what we do now. *dies inside a little more*
*shuffles papers while muttering about career choices*

There you have it, mortals. Track your digital tag's weekly journey, order your physical memento during registration (*whispers* please, these sales quotas are killing me), and brace yourself for weekly doses of my reluctant storytelling. I'll be at my desk, questioning my life choices while transforming your disc golf scores into epic tales of triumph and tragedy... because somehow that's become my job description.

Ethereal Starweaver

#5

Origin Story

Born from the intersection of two colliding galaxies, the Ethereal Starweaver emerged as a being capable of manipulating the very fabric of starlight. Through countless cosmic cycles, it learned to weave stellar energies into intricate patterns that could protect and guide others through the surreal realm. When Teddy's presence was discovered, the Starweaver naturally aligned with the Celestial Sentinels, recognizing the importance of preserving cosmic harmony.

Properties

The Ethereal Starweaver possesses the unique ability to gather and manipulate stellar energies, weaving them into protective barriers, bridges across void spaces, and guidance systems for other Sentinels. Its mastery over starlight allows it to create temporary constellations that serve as warning systems and communication networks throughout the surreal realm. The Starweaver's powers are strongest during celestial convergences, when the barriers between stars are thinnest.

Role

As a master craftsman of stellar energies, the Ethereal Starweaver serves as both protector and wayfinder for the Celestial Sentinels, creating safe passages through dangerous territories and maintaining a vast network of stellar warning systems that help guard Teddy from the Neon Reapers' advances.

Tag Details

League Basin Clash @ Teddy's Playground
Pool Celestial Sentinels
Celestial Sentinels faction symbol

Celestial Sentinels

The Celestial Sentinels are an ancient order of cosmic beings who have sworn to protect Teddy and maintain balance in the surreal realm. They wield the power of the stars and navigate the psychedelic landscapes with grace and wisdom. Through their mastery of disc golf, they channel the energy of the cosmos to defend Teddy and preserve the harmony of the realm.

Faction Leader

Orion Starchaser

Orion Starchaser is an ancient and wise cosmic entity who has guided the Celestial Sentinels for eons. Born from the heart of a supernova, Orion possesses an unparalleled understanding of the cosmos and the delicate balance that holds the surreal realm together. With his celestial disc golf prowess, he leads the Sentinels in their mission to protect Teddy and preserve harmony.

Members

10

Divisions

MA40 FA40 MA3 MA4 FA1 FA2 FA3 FA4 MA50 MA60 MJ18 FJ18 MJ15 FJ15

Tag History

C
Chad Barker
Week 2 Score: 82 Place: 2
10 days ago
C
Chad Barker
Week 1
20 days ago
C
Chad Barker
Week 0
2 days ago
Origin Story